


All I Wanna Do

by closetedskeleton



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Drabble, M/M, Unrequited, kind of past soonwoo but not exactly, meanie are good friends, slight angst, the soonchan is sadly minor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-24
Updated: 2017-10-24
Packaged: 2019-01-22 08:08:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12477112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/closetedskeleton/pseuds/closetedskeleton
Summary: When Wonwoo got off the bus with a giant suitcase and two duffel bags, he didn't think he would be going back with more baggage than he came with.





	All I Wanna Do

**Author's Note:**

> "If he writes her a few sonnets, he loves her. If he writes her 300 sonnets, he loves sonnets."

  
\---

Homecoming feels like everything except that. When the bus lurches to a stop, Bohyuk is there, with his bored expression and ugly graphic t-shirt. Wonwoo had hoped he would have grown out of them but then, ten months isn't all that long.

In his mind, Wonwoo feels like he's been away for ages. But the roads look the same and the corner shops haven't budged and the derelict hospital is still covered in weeds. Belatedly, Wonwoo realises what has changed is the sense of comfort this place once exuded. Now, it could be any street, in any town.

The car turns into a cul-de-sac and Wonwoo's house comes into view. And so does the figure at the front steps. Mingyu is hunched over his phone, tapping away at his game and for all Wonwoo knows, it could be high school again. It could be any of the afternoons when Mingyu used to wait for him after school so they could play video games and snack incessantly.

Mingyu jumps up, excitement lighting up his face as he watches Wonwoo get out of the car. “Wonwoo!” Without a lot of prelude, he wraps Wonwoo in a tight hug.

In the circle of Mingyu’s arms, Wonwoo feels that comfort he came looking for.

 

\---

They're having a very late lunch at a cafe Wonwoo used to love. The decor is ambient and the chairs comfortable and the food good, what's not to love?

 _Oh right,_ the four, loud people occupying the table. It's always a racket when they're together but today it's more so. Wonwoo has been laughing for the better part of the past two hours. Jihoon and Junhui bickering is class entertainment. So is Minghao teasing Mingyu.

He excuses himself to go to the washroom and give his cheeks a break. When he comes back, the four boys are bent over the table in a team huddle and judging by the expressions on their faces, having a very serious discussion.

“I'm just saying, I think we should tell Wonwoo. He deserves to know,” Mingyu says at the same time Jihoon spots Wonwoo and hurries to shush him.

“What should we tell Wonwoo?” he asks casually, sliding into the chair.

It's quiet for a beat. Junhui begins to say, “oh, it's noth-” but Minghao cuts him off.

“Soonyoung is dating someone.”

~

Junhui waves at them one last time before he disappears around the corner.

“Let's go,” Mingyu says and urges Wonwoo into the opposite direction.

They walk silently for a while. A song is playing in Wonwoo's head but he can't place it, so he lets it play out as he looks at the familiar sights passing him by.

“You know, I expected you to react badly but you were, a lot more chill,” Mingyu comments.

May isn't chilly but Wonwoo shivers anyways. “Why wouldn't I be?” he says, and he feels a smile on his lips. What kind it is, he doesn't know. “Unless the boy is not nice, then I'm super no-chill,” he jokes.

Mingyu laughs.

Truth is, Wonwoo doesn't know what he's feeling. He also doesn't know what is appropriate. What would be a logical, rational response to finding that a guy you used to really like, is now dating someone else? Wonwoo’s clueless.  

\---

It wasn't intentional. Sure, Wonwoo borrowed Mingyu’s phone so he could look at his friends’ Instagram accounts, having deleted his own, but he didn't have Soonyoung on his mind.

And now, as he scrolls through image after image, the metaphorical stone on his heart gets heavier and heavier.

Soonyoung, looks so radiant in every single picture. With his rounded cheeks and stunning smile and pretty hair, Wonwoo is being reminded of all the reasons why he liked him as much as he did. Across the board, he watches his hair colour change and the length of time since he last saw Soonyoung, sinks into Wonwoo.

And then there's Chan.

Chan, who is cute and has a smile that rivals Soonyoung’s own, who can dance like a dream and is Soonyoung’s boyfriend. There's so many photos of him with Soonyoung, heads bent close together, shoulders aligned and smiles bright. They look picture perfect.

Wonwoo sighs and casts a glance at Mingyu snoring away in his lap. He regrets this so much.

He's never been one to get jealous about anything, but Wonwoo doesn't know what else to call this complicated tangle of emotions. He doesn't know whether he's angry that Soonyoung didn't mention Chan in a single one of their conversations, or sad that… Chan exists at all.

Either way, it's pathetic. Because last Wonwoo checked, he had gotten over Soonyoung seven months ago, once and for all. At least, that's what he thought.

Mingyu wakes up to see Wonwoo staring off into space, phone in hand, a picture of Soonyoung grinning at a cake-covered Chan on the screen.

“Wonwoo,” he croaks. Clearing his throat, he straightens up and sits next to Wonwoo. “I shouldn't have told you,” he laments.

Wonwoo breaks out of his trance and smiles, now he knows, sadly. “No, I'm glad you did. Well, not _glad_ but…” he trails off.

Mingyu bites his lips, eyebrows furrowed. “Listen,” he sits up straight, snatches the phone from Wonwoo and tosses it aside. “I downright _hate_ Soonyoung for this.”

Wonwoo opens his mouth to protest that blatant statement but Mingyu is quick to cut him off. “No, don't defend him. He treated you so unfairly, Wonwoo. Why won't you realise that? You're nice, you deserved so much better.”

The corners of Wonwoo's mouth droop. He wants to scoff sarcastically and brush it all off as silly and just stop the stream of words from Mingyu’s mouth because they're digging up things he doesn't want to remember.

He mumbles something about it not being Soonyoung’s fault that—

But Mingyu cuts him off again. “Wonwoo, come on. He messed with your feelings so bad.” He places his palms on Wonwoo's knees as he faces him. “And I hate him for that.”

Despite everything, Wonwoo can't even fathom that idea.

\---

It seems everyone is scheming to put Wonwoo on edge because the very next morning, Soonyoung calls and asks Wonwoo to come over for lunch. He makes a lot of small talk ( _heard you were back for the break, how's New York, how’s your college, and the like_ ), oblivious to the churning of Wonwoo’s stomach.

It feels like in no time, Wonwoo is here, sitting on the rickety wooden swing with Soonyoung in his backyard. The numerous sunsets he's watched rom this very place seem to flash before his eyes in quick succession.

Soonyoung looks better than ever. Full cheeks and bright eyes, a picture of health. His shoulders look broader and arms a little more toned than Wonwoo remembers. He turns now to look at him, apprehension on his face.

“I want to tell you something I probably should have told you a while back,” he says, fingers playing with a loose thread on his shorts. Wonwoo's eyes trace along the action.

He almost blurts out that he already knows what it is, but bites down on the retort.

Soonyoung continues, “I like someone.”

Wonwoo looks up at his face. Though Soonyoung is trying to hide it, there's an unmistakable, shy little smile on his lips and the faintest blush. It stands all the more brighter as the wind brushes his honey blonde hair away from his face.

On his part, Wonwoo can't help but feel a little happy for Soonyoung. “Yeah? Who is it?” he asks, like a good friend would, like a friend who isn't bitter would.

“It's a junior from school,” Soonyoung says, smile growing by the second before it falls off altogether. “I didn't know how to tell you.”

And Wonwoo wants to laugh, and spit that he hasn't even told him the whole truth!

But he doesn't. “What's so hard to say about that?”

That seems to please Soonyoung, for he shakes his head with a grin. “Nothing at all.”

At this moment, Wonwoo is happy for Soonyoung as much as he is bitter, as much as he resents himself for feeling either of those things.

“Let's watch a movie,” Soonyoung offers. Wonwoo accepts.

Soonyoung goes on to his room while Wonwoo goes into the washroom at the end of the hall. When he walks back, the door of the room is ajar and he can hear voices from within—one that is distinctly Soonyoung’s and another that he cannot recognise as any of their friend’s.

Wonwoo slows down his steps as he hovers outside the door, torn between turning around, and barging in. Then he hears Soonyoung giggling and compelling Wonwoo to look in.

Through the crack, Wonwoo sees Soonyoung sitting on the edge of the bed, profile striking and head raised to look at Chan, who is straddling him. Their conversation is a dull, indeterminate murmur but Chan’s responding laugh is bright and scintillating. Wonwoo watches him bend down and place a kiss on Soonyoung’s temple.

It's intrusive of him to watch but he does it anyway, even as something dark and heavy settles on his shoulders. With every press of Soonyoung’s hands against Chan’s hips, it drips down the ridges of his spine, till he feels it physically weighing him down.

He's seeing all his dreams projected in three-dimensional and it hurts anew. Still in a daze, Wonwoo moves back and away from the door and walks out of the house.

Even walking feels like a task so he does it slowly, no rush. He'll reach home eventually.

~

Summer seems all too short at the end of it, despite all the long, unending days. Before he really knows it, Wonwoo is on a flight back to New York and then he's walking into his dorm room, suitcase and bags and emotional baggage in hand.

Abandoning all of those by the foot of his bed, Wonwoo lies down like a plank, staring straight up at the ceiling. After who knows how long, the door opens and Vernon, his roommate steps in.

“Oh, you're back!” he says.

Wonwoo smiles wryly at him and nods. “Hi.”

Vernon plops down on his own bed and starts rambling about the summer he had on campus because he didn't go home, and Wonwoo listens only half-heartedly.

“I'm glad you're back, though,” Vernon says soberly, excitement having worn off a little. “It was getting kind of boring without you here.” He chuckles awkwardly.

As the implication of that sinks in, Wonwoo feels a strange sense of relief, a brief moment of respite from his pit of self-pity. He smiles. “Yeah, I missed you too."

 

**Author's Note:**

> TL;DR I don't fucking know what I'm doing you guys


End file.
